Now, for those of you who are going to say, "Told ya so," and all that, just stuff it; I told you so, too! The experience I'm about to relate is the very reason I did not buy into any of the last three or four Big Events (Civil War, Skrull Invasion, Dark Reign, et,al.), but it's more than that.
Marvel has yet to top The Mutant Massacre of the 1980s. Marvel has yet to top anything during Jim Shooter's reign, and that includes Secret Wars II and the embarrassment that was The Beyonder. Still, Siege could have been a pretty fun romp, in addition to being a cash cow; instead, it is a convoluted practice in padding, a complete letdown, and an arrogant slap in the face.
I wanted to bring you updates along the way - what I thought about the first month, second, etc. - but the truth is that I got completely lost in the second month. That's beyond "not good" - that's fucked-up, because Marvel is a major, damn publisher - #1 of what is known as The Big Two! That's a fuck-up of Exxon-Valdez proportions.
What happened is as obvious as it is lamentable, and the point at which 1000 fanboys scream,"Told ya so!" in unison: Siege was a hit, so Marvel immediately sought to capitalize on it to the nth degree. Strictly speaking, you really can't fault them for that; that's what companies do: They make money, and when a money-making opportunity presents itself, they are poised to jump on it. However, you certainly can fault them for doing so in the most half-assed, haphazard way imaginable.
Remember that I checked the "Siege and All Crossovers" option. During Month One of Siege, my bill (for Siege-related items, alone) was about $50. You can imagine my shock when I logged into my account on Month Two to find that had ballooned to more than double - somewhere in the neighborhood of $130, for Siege-related items alone!!! Many of these were one-shots. Come Month Three, I was weeding-out the Siege crossover titles/issues, because literally every title Marvel publishes was getting in on the act, and my bill for Siege-related items alone was around $200!!! In fact, that's why I'm writing this:
I have a boxful of Siege comics setting directly to my right and I haven't the faintest idea as to where to begin! I became immediately disenchanted last month when I opened Dark Avengers #14 to find that the story apparently happened before the siege of Asgard - which is really fucked-up, because Dark Avengers #13 happened during the siege of Asgard... It doesn't get any better from there.
Again, I have all the Siege crossover issues from the first two months, and I'm reading them in the order in which they are listed on the Checklist. Unfortunately, New Mutants #11 isn't listed in there, nor are any of these one-shots, and seeing as how I guess I should have read Dark Avengers #14 before I read #13 - and, thus, before I read any of Siege or Siege: Embedded, et.al. - I was afraid I'd end-up reading the wrong one(s) first... or second, wait.
AAAARRGGGH!
I searched, in vain, for a Siege Flowchart. If I can figure this all out, I may create one for you, once this is all said and done, but I'm torn: On the one hand, the events of Siege ostensibly lead into The Heroic Age and relaunch the Avengers titles (and, yes, I'm buying the foundation issues, but then I'm done), so it is arguably important; OTOH... who fucking cares? You know? It's so obvious that 90% of the "Siege-related" crossover items are unimportant to the actual story; they are just profiteering.
What have I continually told you? You want a big, fat, "I TOLD YA SO!" ?
Every, single time Marvel gets a greenlight - every time interest in comic books soars - they blow the bottom out of the whole thing. This will ruin comics for most young collectors, and the hobby will sag once again. It's already starting to happen!
So, I'm doing just what I said I would: I'm biting the bullet on Siege, and I'll buy the foundation issues for this Heroic Age, and then - you listening, Marvel Comics? - I'm out. Never fear, they'll still strangle a hefty $30-50 from me each month with all the many X-titles, but that's a personal thing; I have a nice X-collection which is, now, far more a point of pride than a source of joy. That's my burden to bear, but I told y'all going-in that it was like this.
This one's on me, Marvel.
SHUT IT DOWN.
© C Harris Lynn, 2010
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5 comments:
Well, D.C. does pretty much the same thing. I picked up "Identity Crisis" a few years back and thought it was a really excellent story. So when it led directly into "Infinite Crisis" which was also billed as a sequel to "Crisis on Infinite Earths", I went for it and found it disappointing. Then when they had their "Final Crisis" every issue somehow felt ike there was a huge chunk of the story missing. I didn't bother buying all the cross-overs, so maybe that was the problem. And then I got suckered into the recent "Blackest Night" after reading some very interesting developments in Green Lantern. But I refuse to waste my money (and time) on "Brightest Day" or on whatever that ends up leading directly into. More and more I find that I am collecting comic adaptations of novels; i.e Ender's Game, The Dark Tower, The Dresden Files. They are more satisfying and they have and end point (eventually).
I called the DC thing - 52 issues of a "major event which will change the DC Multiverse FOREVER," etc.? Yeah, right. Especially when you consider the fact that, as you pointed-out, they've been having this major event, year-round, for something like five years now and it stretches back more than 15-20 years to start with!
Again, I'm not completely naive - and I know you aren't either - so I can stand this behavior to a certain extent, but I've reached my limit!
When I was about 10 years old, my desire to be a "rock star" was replaced with a lifelong wont to be a comic book creator. That dream fell by the wayside in the 90s, when they pulled this very same stunt.
I'm angry that they suckered me in, but I went in with my eyes (and wallet) wide open, and freely admit that. I'm far angrier that they did this to other customers, particularly younger collectors.
Here is the perfect opportunity to present the best sequential art that can be had, and create fans for life, but these jerks did exactly what I said they would and chose, instead, to sucker all the money they can out of everyone, just because the opportunity presented itself. It should turn everyone off!
Two bulls stand on a hill, overlooking a pasture full of beautiful cows. One is young, the other old.
The young cow says, "Let's run down this hill and fuck one of them cows!"
The older one scoffs, and replies, "No, son; let's walk down this hill and fuck them all."
I was wrong: New Mutants #11 is on the Siege Checklist; I was looking at the wrong month.
Regardless, the numerous one-shots are not and Dark Avengers is completely out-of-synch with the rest of the event. Furthermore, it still doesn't change what I said. Had I gotten all the variant covers - which, BTW, I am also so completely over - and all the rest, you wouldn't be reading this, because I'd be sitting in the effing dark!
I have a full post in me on this topic, and I'll get to it, but it boils down to this:
They spent seven years on this!? Really!?
Okay, I hate to be ugly, I really do - I mean, I want to like the entertainment I buy - but this breaks down one of two ways:
They are just saying that as a marketing gimmick; they're lying through their teeth. They didn't spend seven effing months planning this, from a story perspective, though they may well have spent seven years working the PR/marketing angles for a then-unnamed EVENT.
If they did spend seven years on this, they suck. They are talentless hacks. The editors, in particular, should be looking for jobs outside of the comics industry.
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