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Monday, October 30, 2006

Last Minute Costume Ideas

Hi there. Guest blogger Sean Lovett here. You might remember me from... nevermind, you don't know me. Anyway, with Halloween being tomorrow, I'm sure a lot of you are just like me and have no idea what to be for Halloween.

You're probably sick of the old, played out, costumes that everyone and their dog has dressed up as for many years. You probably are also sick of the campy, comedic costumes. You know who you are. We've all done it. We figured we'd go as something like a doctor or a cocktail waitress. Come on. That's lame and played out also. Halloween is about scaring and being scared.

So, don't worry. I'm here to help you scare the hell out of everyone you come across this Halloween. I now present you with a few of my last minute Halloween costume ideas.

1. George Bush
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Now, hear me out on this. I know on the surface this seems like a dumb costume and everyone else will probably have a similar idea. However, you can one up them and scare the hell out of everyone by telling them you've abolished the 22nd amendment and shall remain in office forever!

2. Dick Cheney
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Again, I understand that this may not be very scary and that others may already be dressing as him. But, as long as you let people know that your new heart is 100% mechanical and guaranteed to last forever so that you can be right there to help Karl Rove pull Bush's strings forever, they'll run away screaming their heads off. Oh, you'll also want to carry a shotgun and refer to everyone you meet as your good friend.

3. Donald Rumsfeld
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Scare the pants off of people by letting them know that you plan to continue to tell Bush to stay in Iraq, seriously deplete our armed forces while Iran and North Korea continue to become growing threats, and that you have no plans for any sort of exit!

4. Mark Foley
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Last, but not least, let the children of your neighborhood (specifically boys) know that you mean business. When you answer the door to hand out candy, ask the children (specifically boys) if they have internet access. When they say yes, give them a creepy smile and then you chat client handle. Make sure their parents aren't watching or listening.

There you have it folks. Last minute Halloween costume ideas that will scare the hell out of anyone and everyone. Don't forget, it's time for a change. Let's send that message loud and clear on November 7th!

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