Heroes... Really?

Okay, so Heroes has been on what, two, nearly three, months now? And what exactly has happened so far?

Not much, by my count -- not much at all.

[SPOILERS]

Every week, we've been promised that the next episode would "answer everything," and the one after that "will change everything," and the episode after that one "will bring them all together," and yet, while some things have been answered, not much has changed, and they are still not together.

I saw the way the whole Peter saving the cheerleader thing was going to go -- after all, we already know that he soaks up the powers of whomever he gets close to (re: Leech from the Morlocks in Uncanny X-Men), so if he's saving the cheerleader... okay, neat plot thingy that maybe not everyone put together, but I figured that one out when he and Simone saw the painting of him dying. Call me smrat.

Niki's been running from her ex since the show began, and we actually know less about all of them now that he's finally appeared! How does that even happen? I have a good idea that he's going to be the one who dies tomorrow, but it could be Isaac -- or even Simone or Ando/Andy (whatever his name is). At any rate, they sure as hell don't know how to juggle storylines, so they shouldn't have tried such a large cast -- at the very least, they should have introduced them more slowly. What happened to the cop? I don't even know the cop's name and he's one of my favorite characters, so far...

Still, I really didn't pay that much attention to this week's episode, even the Sci-Fi rerun Friday (6:00 PM, CST)! I'm just kind of over it at this point. I mean, I tune in to see Peter getting arrested - very interesting, let's see where this leads... it leads to six months ago, when Hiro traveled. Oh yeah, when he traveled at the beginning of last episode and they didn't mention it again until this week...

Way to kill the tension.

I could go on and on, because as a writer, I have done this very thing a thousand times: you're afraid you're going to give everything away up-front, so you keep hedging - you keep teasing the audience, then drawing back at the last moment, to reveal nothing - and it's a really bad, amateurish mistake that even big-time, successful authors sometimes make. And one that Kring and company are making, left and right, every week. Eventually, the audience catches on and loses interest - they'll tune back in, after they hear something actually happened - but what was once a "can't-miss" show becomes a "we'll flip at commercials" back-up to The Closer or something.

Sadly, I'll have to admit that it's pretty true to actual comics. Now, if they'd only advertise major guest-stars, then have them show up for a cameo in a group shot (the TV equivalent of the great artist on the cover, the horrid unknown doing the pencils inside), it'd be Marvel TV. Along these lines, what would be kind of cool is an "Annual Issue" - an extra episode a year or maybe a webisode or bit in the online graphic novel that's not really essential to the ongoing story, but is a... you know, like an annual.

At any rate, I would never have expected the actual creators of the content I talk about here to read this blog, but you'd be surprised - I certainly have been! (more on that later, check the website for more details - well, not yet, but soon) - and I did notice that after I criticized the show for not framing their shots, and using a more cinema-veritae/documentary style which I felt detracted from the comic book atmosphere, the next episode or two had great, KILLER, framed shots. I mean literally Frank Miller-style, noirish, single-themed panels - really kick-ass images, especially for a TV show! There really were whole sequences that made me sit up and think, "This is what a moving picture comic book looks like!" It was the second or third episode, or around there - it should probably stand out from the rest, as I've yet to notice it so strongly since then.

So, on the offhand chance that the creators of Heroes are listening, do us a favor: watch about two weeks' worth of any decent soap opera. Seriously. Those shows are so far over the top, with such incredibly large casts, and they run every day - yet they have some of the most loyal fans in TV-dom. You can't go wrong by seeing how they structure their stories and tempering it to a weekly series. Also, READ COMIC BOOKS.

Go get everything Frank Miller has ever done and read it. Read it again. This time, read it without reading the words. Now, rip out every page, blow them up, and storyboard them like you were going to film it. See? Frank Miller's an effing genius, kids; one of the few, true American legends living today. See how he does it? Yeah, he's a bonafide bad-ass and no, you can't touch him, but you can learn from him... and maybe have him guest direct an episode or ten? And, um, if you really want to make a classic TV series, have him write a single season. Trust me, he's totally brilliant in short runs on anything. He's a genius, you know.

Speaking of genius, don't forget Frisky Dingo tonight! By far, the best thing on [Adult Swim] -- there's not even a hint of competition until Venture Bros. comes back. We'll also see if Assy McGee redeems itself. I don't know if [AS] realizes how close to the edge they really are; even I watched Comedy Central's South Park reruns last week and then tuned-in for Dingo and Metalocalypse, etc. I caught the earlier shows on the late-night reruns, but that's not... for a confirmed and loyal fan, that's not... not too good, you know?