The Oscars: Pffft!

When I was a kid, the Academy Awards Show was a big-time, annual event. My folks would turn it on in the living room and we kids would usually watch it together in another room. Mom would warm-up the big popcorn machine and make about half a bag (that would be plenty for both rooms for the entire night - with much leftover).

We would all root for the Best Actor/Actress and Best Film - generally one that we had actually seen in the theater that year and really enjoyed. I remember we saw Wargames, but I don't remember if it was nominated for anything. I recall standing outside through one showing for Raiders of the Lost Ark before we got to see it in a packed house - leaving a line behind us that stretched around the block (just like the one we sat in for two hours). I don't remember if it was nominated for anything.

Last night, I watched Ordinary People, which won at least two Oscars in 1980 for Best Actor (Timothy Hutton - much-deserved, I freely admit!) and Best Director (Robert Redford... it was pretty well-directed, yes, but I know Raging Bull was nominated against it and even though I care nothing for Raging Bull [not a sports fan, I], Marty Scorsese is a better director - and Raging Bull is a classic, so...) and I have to say... you know? I mean, good movie and all, but not exactly - I don't know. It deserved Oscars and is worth watching at least once, but I will never watch Ordinary People again; I got everything I am going to get out of it in one viewing.

What I'm getting at is that, by the time I was an adolescent, the Oscars just didn't matter to me anymore. I mean, of all the movies on my "favorites" list, only a handful ever garnered nominations for anything and far fewer than that actually won anything. On the other hand, many of those on my list have gone on to become [cult] classics.

Everything is different now, obviously. I am much older, most movies are available for home-viewing shortly after they appear in theaters, there are no real movie "stars" anymore (just "celebrities"), and popcorn comes in microwavable, single-serving bags. But Hollywood, while still very much the same in many ways, is very different in others. And one of the ways in which it is forever changed is that the Oscars simply don't matter anymore.

Have you ever even heard of Ordinary People? Probably not, but you have almost definitely seen Raging Bull. I couldn't tell you another movie featuring Timothy Hutton (even though, again, he was great in this flick and he deserved an Oscar for his performance), but I can rattle-off at least a dozen movies featuring Bobby DeNiro, including at least a half-dozen I've never even seen (A Bronx Tale, Frankenstein, Awakenings, a ton more...).

I was asking someone the other night why this person and that one are famous, and in response to pretty much every name I mentioned, she said, "Well, she's rich; that's why she's famous." And that pretty much says it all, doesn't it?

I don't know who's nominated for what, couldn't care less, can't remember who won last year or the year before for anything - couldn't care less - and so on, right down the line. In fact, the only Oscar win that stands-out in my mind is Marisa Tomei's - and not for the right reasons (even as I typed that, I was shocked that she won... why!? You know? WHY!?). I don't know any of these "stars" and none of us will remember them next year; they're famous simply because they're famous, not because they're good or because they've actually done anything to deserve the attention they're receiving.

And even if things were basically the same as they were when I was a kid, none of us remember any of those movies, either! So, what the hell's the point?

Hollow-wood just never gets tired of patting themselves on the back, and this once-revered "event" is just another in an ever-growing line of the same. Add it to the Golden Globes, the Emmys, the Grammys, the Cable Ace Awards, the VMA, blahblahblah - on down the line.

Give these overpaid blowhards a Webelos badge for bullshit and stfu.

© C Harris Lynn, 2008