Every once in a while, I like to let you in on my life a little - just so you understand why so many of the posts here are generalized and why I do not accomplish more:
About an hour ago, I realized my drunken friend (the Loud Talker who has apparently been up drinking all night long because he left here around 10pm last night drunk and showed-up on my door at 7:30am this morning with a beer) had apparently taken my shoes!
WHO DOES THAT!? Who goes to another man's house at 7:30 in the morning, wakes him up, and takes his damn shoes!?
People from Decatur County, TN - that's who.
So I'm on the phone with an actual friend and she's telling me she considers me "a brilliant man," and before I can even be bothered to take the compliment, a commotion arises behind me. I turn to see the cat twisting - twisting - in the window!
I arose in a hurry to see what was the matter:
Turns out Scamper had somehow managed to get tangled in the windowshade cord and was quickly suffocating! I was on the phone and thought only his little paw was caught. He was fighting furiously at first, then began laying still and was not breathing. I could not figure out where the cord was nor how to undo it and could not push the table and all the shit in front of it away quickly enough to get to the cord, so I had to rush to the kitchen and cut him free, thus destroying my blinds.
And one of the sponsors still has not paid me. It gets better: one of their servers went down yesterday, so the system auto-failed a payment due and I've yet to hear back from them about that...
So, I ask you - all brilliance aside:
Who the living fuck steals a man's shoes!?
© C Harris Lynn, 2008
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