Advice for Con-Goers

All we con attendees know the unwritten rules, and most of us know the written ones (which we usually ignore - like the one about keeping alcoholic beverages in the con suite, just... just an example - first thing that came to mind), but we tend to get swept-up in the moment. Your really good con is a lot like a really good sexual encounter: whether or not you expect it to be any good, you suddenly realize just how good it is, you get a bit overexcited, and it's over far too soon.

But here is a list of tips to avoid the Con Crud. The comments mention another list which I found crass and entirely too serious. Conventions are a lot of fun, but there is a certain sub-sect who take the entire thing far too seriously - as though it is some important event on a par with a political luncheon - and this is usually the same sub-sect that takes gaming itself far too seriously.

I'll probably suffer some backlash for this, but since these lists are fairly honest and straightforward, I'm going to take this time to reiterate what I have said before, as it applies to conventions:

There are two types of roleplaying gamers: gamers and people who like to game. Don't be a gamer.

A gamer : people who play RPGs :: an alcoholic : someone who drinks. Take that to heart!

As in the above analogy, people who drink sometimes drink to excess and go overboard - they sometimes drink (to excess) for several days at a time, or several days in a month - and may even get into a little trouble here and there because of it; but they don't lose jobs over drinking. They don't alienate friends and family or get pushed out of general, mainstream society over their drinking. Alcoholics do. And if you think this is an extreme analogy, I am here to tell you from personal experience, it most certainly is not!

I have literally known actual people, IRL, who have done all of these things - and many more - over role-playing! It sounds ridiculous - and believe you, me, it is - but I promise you it's true. If you think I'm exaggerating, you should ask around.

A former roommate (and childhood friend) actually stuck me with the rent and stole a box of very expensive comic books because he was so into fricking Changeling! The guy had blown-off his job so he could play pretty much 24/7 (they had to keep in-game diaries) and he didn't have his rent. He had moved his girlfriend in (who also played) more or less behind my back (she just showed-up to play one day and never left), after she left her husband and three children because they were just too much responsibility and she no longer had time to game ¹. After a few weeks of this, I mentioned I couldn't afford to carry them any longer and he was going to have to either find the money or make other arrangements. So he and his girlfriend emptied his stuff out of the house while I was at work one night and stole a box of extremely expensive comic books to finance their migration to another player's house. He is now wanted by the police for something unrelated (to these events) and, last I heard, the two of them moved to Canada!

This all happened because of a roleplaying game!!! (And a bad one, at that!) And this is just one of the 4-5 cases I have personally witnessed.

The second list was written by a gamer. I hope he doesn't take it to the extremes the guy above did, but the list reads like some kid's list of Club Rules (No Girls Allowed!). Unfortunately, gamers really do need to be reminded of these things! If you read this list and think something along the lines of, "Damn! Like, DUH. This is crazy!" you're safe; otherwise, get some help.

Again, gaming is fun and good conventions are an absolute blast! But don't be a gamer.
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¹ True story, honest to God. One night, she told me, "I shouldn't have had children, I just don't have time for them and don't want them. It's not that I don't love them, but, I mean, they're not like gaming to me!" Of course, she said this in a semi-humorous way, but she willfully gave up her rights to see them ever again a week later. Horrified, I said, "Well, it's a little late for that, isn't it?" This, of course, further cemented their "relationship," making me The Bad Guy. These were truly awful human beings, I'll grant you - and one of the reasons I use this case to illustrate - and this is a real extreme, but a lot of the people I knew who lost jobs, etc., had the very same attitude.

© C Harris Lynn, 2008