About the Economy... Oh Deer

So I'm flat broke. I mean seriously broke. I do not have the money to pay my utilities, DirecTV, or Internet and phone this month. I honestly do not know what happened - I had to have made a mistake because according to my calculations, I should have had around $150 left after my bills were paid this month... well, I already know that part is wrong because I am behind on several of them, so even with that, I should have had around $50 and it isn't like I went on a shopping-spree or anything!

In fact, that's what I'm here to post about:

The only meat I've been able to afford this month is potted meat and pork steaks - they have been on-sale at the local grocery store. I had a frozen pack of six drumsticks and baked those last week. I still have two left and will likely enjoy those tomorrow, as I ate two last night. I have one pork steak already prepared which I plan on heating-up later tonight. I am going to cream a few potatoes and make a can of black-eyed peas to go with it.

Problem is, aside from that, I have a couple more pork steaks, a pack of bacon, and some packaged salami. And am flat-broke - busted! So that's my whole meat menu for the rest of November. Of course, I expect at least one or two plates for Thanksgiving, but there it is.

This says nothing of the rest of my cupboards which are, for the most part, about as bare. So am I just going to starve?

Not exactly:

A friend of a friend's gave her a shoulder and hindquarter of what must have been a fairly large deer. That's right: free meat - and plenty of it! Problem is, I know absolutely nothing about venison. I have this hulking slab o' perfectly good deer setting in my sink (where it has been since yesterday) in icy saltwater. I have drained it four times so far, each time, the water has been filled with blood. Apparently, this curing process extracts the "game" from the meat - which, if you have ever eaten venison that was not properly cured, you know can be quite off-putting.

Tomorrow, another friend is coming over to show me how to properly butcher this large slab o' meat. I will have venison steaks, at least one large roast, and several containers full of stew meat. Again, I have no real idea how to prepare any of these things.

As for the roast, I will cut several potatoes, some celery, an onion, and toss in about half a bag of baby carrots. I may include a ¹/₂ tsp. of garlic. I will liberally season with meat tenderizer, seasoning salt, black pepper, and assorted herbs. I will fill the trusty Crockpot with water, set it to low, and let it cook the entire day I am gone to the doctor's. I am hoping it will be as delicious as the same recipe is when made with either beef or pork. I may - or may not - include a few slices of bacon for flavoring, as well.

As for the steak, I have been told to season and batter it the way you would any other meat. Pan fry it in oil to medium-rare (otherwise it will be tough) and enjoy. I am thinking I will have it with fried potatoes... maybe creamed? And most likely some green beans.

Now the stew or soup? Well, you got me. I have never made a stew or a soup. I take that back - I did once and that was only because I was trying to make something else and screwed it up. It was not a bad stew - not at all! - but let's just say this: I ate it twice that night and threw the rest out.

I got lucky. I really did. Without this deer meat - which I have no idea how to butcher, had no idea how to cure, and really do not know the first thing about cooking correctly - I would be gnawing on salami sandwiches clear through Thanksgiving.

They may try to tell you there is no recession, but I guarantee you, when I spend $20 at the grocery store and leave without cheese, meats, milk, and absolutely nothing "rewarding" (like sweets or whatever), there is something wrong. In fact, the last time I went to the store, the only thing I bought that could even be construed as unnecessary was a 2-liter Coca-Cola. Everything else was barebones cooking ingredients: sugar, brown sugar, flour, margarine (not butter!), eggs, and a loaf of bread (plus some cat litter, catfood, aluminum foil - technically "non-essentials," but things I had to have). And that 2-liter Coca-Cola.

So the cool thing is that I am about to learn how to cure, prepare, butcher, and cook a brand new meat. The bad thing is I have no choice.

© C Harris Lynn, 2008